Monday Night Disaster: The Denver Broncos http://www.broncoscheapauthenticstore.com/ronald-leary-jersey-cheap , Baltimore Ravens, and Dick Van Patten There once was a time when being an out-of-market Broncos fan took an incredible amount of effort. It was a time before the RedZone channel or up-to-the-minute updates on your smartphone. It was a time when, to check a score, calling a cellular provider hotline was cutting edge technology. This was the time when Yahoo! made people pay a fee for StatTracker so you could check your fantasy score... but only from a computer!Back in 2002, this was my way of life. Working as a production assistant in film and television, there was no telling where I’d be working on any given day and it made following the Denver Broncos challenging. When The Santa Trap (here’s the trailer) began production in late September of 2002, I found myself working in Palm Springs. As you can probably guess from the title, this was a Christmas movie revolving around Santa being unfairly arrested, putting the prospect of Christmas severely in doubt. It was sort of like an Ernest Saves Christmas kind of movie, but without Ernest. Were it not for the dogged efforts of two young children and the help of Santa’s wily elves, all hope for a wholesome family Christmas would be lost!...but I didn’t care about that. After sweating in the triple-digit heat all day, dealing with a surly grip and electric crew based out of Utah, and not getting paid a whole heck of a lot for any of it, all I wanted to do was watch a bit of the Denver Broncos versus the Baltimore Ravens on Monday Night Football. Since half of the work we were slated to shoot that day involved night scenes, I was excited that our filming schedule put lunchtime squarely at kickoff. Typically on movies, when the cast and crew go to lunch, a caterer prepares a hot meal andsets up all the tables and chairs needed. What was noteworthy about that night was that instead of setting up in the front driveway as they had previous nights, the caterer set everything up in the backyard, poolside. Because of the insane heat in Palm Springs, most backyards in the area are small to non-existent. Who in their right mind would want to spend time outside in that heat and not in the pool, right? This space was no different with the pool occupying most of the patio and all but a very little strip of grass adjacent to it. At the time, none of that mattered to me. I had already laid claim to an empty production trailer and was frantically re-jiggering the rabbit ears on the tiny television to tune into the Broncos game. Although the color would flicker in and out and the picture would occasionally roll down the screen and reset, it was Broncos football! I flopped on the couch, set my walkie-talkie down, and put my feet up. The Broncos received the opening kickoff and weren’t able to move the ball more than a few yards before having to punt it back to the Baltimore. On the following drive Cheap Von Miller Jersey , I was heartened by a Jason Elam field goal. The Broncos were on the board! That’s when it all went wrong.To most folks my age and younger, Dick Van Patten is best known as King Roland, father to the Druish Princess Vespa in the Mel Brooks classic, Spaceballs. To folks older than me, he was the father figure on a show called Eight is Enough. However, in this movie Dick played the title role of Santa Claus. That meant that in order for him to appear on-camera, he had to have the trademark red outfit, wig, beard, fat suit, boots, spectacles, and whatever else needed to make the transformation as convincing as it was. It was almost as if the moment Ravens quarterback Chris Redman hit tight end Todd Heap for Baltimore’s first touchdown, my production walkie-talkie crackled to life with a panicked voice at the other end. “Is there anyone in basecamp?”Lunch interruptions were usually followed by some sort of task that all but certainly ended meal time. I would have liked to pretend not to hear it, but there was something in the assistant director’s voice that compelled my attention from the game to my production radio. His voice was slow and methodical, filled with stress. Almost desperate.“Hair. Makeup. Wardrobe. I need them up here right away. We’ve got an emergency. Dick has fallen into the pool.”This was not good news. Not only because of Dick’s advance age, but because everything central to transforming him into Santa Claus had gone into the pool with him and was now dripping wet. That meant that scenes scheduled to be shot that evening following lunch could not be. It was a huge deal. ...and Tom Rouen’s punt had just been blocked, setting up a two-yard Jamal Lewis Ravens touchdown. Things were not going well for Denver either.Since I was watching the Broncos, I was the only person around to round up those desperately needed departments to put Dick back together again. Hair, makeup, and wardrobe usually ate in their trailers and tonight was no different.Before heading back to set, I checked into the game one last time to see how the Broncos were doing. Perfect timing to see Denver corner Deltha O’Neal get pass interference and unsportsmanlike conduct penalties on one play. That was quickly followed by an offsides penalty on DT Chester McGlockton and an unnecessary roughness call on LB John Mobley successively. When, during the same drive, DL Trevor Pryce, gave Baltimore nine yards and a first down for taunting Cheap Matt Paradis Jersey , I decided it was time to get back to work.When I arrived in the backyard, I was surprised at how deserted the back patio was. All departmental crew were elsewhere, scrambling to prepare for scenes that hadn’t been scheduled to be shot that evening, covering for the title character’s absence. The timer-controlled pool lights had come on, bathing the abandoned back patio in a calming shade of blue. Were it not for the lone hamburger patty floating atop a rainbow puddle of grease or the little clusters of potato salad that dotted the pool floor, no one would have ever known that Santa had been there.I never did see soggy-Santa, but I heard that “a very cheesed off Dick Van Patten was soaked from head to toe,” his boots full of water as he sloshed back to change out of his wet costume. Standing there by myself in the deserted backyard, I tried to imagine how Santa Claus tumbled into the pool. Was there one step and in, like a deep sea diver? Did he fall backward, flailing his arms just prior to entry? At what point did he let go of his paper plate? Why was there a hamburger patty, but no bun? The soggy french fries threatening to teeter into the pool filter yielded few clues. Unfortunately, the Broncos didn’t fare much better than Dick Van Patten that night. Denver was outscored 31-3 in that first half and never got back into the game. Quarterback Brian Griese was sacked three times, threw three interceptions, and failed in a two-point conversion. Kicker Jason Elam missed field goals of 44 and 57-yards, the last one returned by Baltimorefor a touchdown to end the half. Things don’t always work out the way we think they’re going to. I thought I was going to sneak a couple quarters of Broncos football in during lunch and I’ll be damned if it didn’t end up an evening that I’ll never forget... For me, it will always be the night that Dick Van Patten and the Denver Broncos both sank. This will be an unpleasant power rankings for Week 10. 1. Kansas City Chiefs:Congrats to the Chiefs, you are the new “Best Team” in the NFL. I debated putting the Saints up here, but the Chiefs didn’t do anything to warrant being leap frogged. Remember how last year everyone was saying that the Eagles would lose like they always did in the playoffs? Well, that didn’t happen and people keep saying the same thing about the Chiefs. Just use that for a bit of food for thought. I’d love to see a Super Bowl with my #1 and #2 ranked teams.2. New Orleans Saints:Who they say gonna beat dem Saints? 3a. Los Angeles Rams:Going into the meat grinder in New Orleans is tough for everyone, but its what championship teams do! This was the first zit on the Rams’ face. And don’t look now, but you have the Chiefs in 2 weeks. 3b. New England Patriots: Notice they aren’t #4 which would be a drop in the rankings when like the Chiefs, they didn’t do anything to warrant that. I can’t put them ahead of the Rams, but I can’t put them behind the rams (even though a ‘b’ means they’re behind). Oh well, maybe the rams win 51 of 100 games and that’s why.5. Carolina Panthers:The Panthers are for real. This team is getting crazy scary at just the right time. They have 2 of their last 3 games against the Saints for what will surely be the division crown.6. Los Angeles Chargers:This team is without a doubt one of the hottest teams in all of football. While I don’t think they’ll catch the Chiefs unless the Chiefs forget how to play football Cheap Bradley Chubb Jersey , I do firmly believe this team is in the playoffs as a wildcard and will knock off either the Patriots or the Steelers. 7. Pittsburgh Steelers:Going into Baltimore, which is your primary divisional rival is no easy task. Why are they behind the Chargers? Simple, because I just picked the Chargers to beat them in January.8. Green Bay Packers: What’s a crying shame is that they have the best QB in all of football (maybe. See Patrick Mahomes), but his talents are being wasted on a below average team. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, If Aaron Rogers was on the Denver Broncos, the Broncos would be 9-0 right now and an absolute juggernaut. Hell, the AFC West would have the top 3 teams in the playoffs like they did only a handful of years ago.9. Minnesota Vikings:Congrats, you beat the Lions. Yippee. Cousins is ok, but he also has the shortest throwing distance for passes in the NFL, which means he’s barely tossing the ball beyond the line of scrimmage, which is why he has a 70% completion rate. Again, stats don’t tell the whole story. Who you rather have, Cousins or Brees? Because even Case Keenum has more passing yards than Brees! 10. Baltimore Ravens: The Ravens remind me a lot of the Jaguars right now. I just don’t know if they’re broken as badly or not. They can beat anyone, but lose to anyone. And it’s not like losing to the Steelers is bad, it happens, but I just can’t put my finger on the pulse of this team.11. Houston Texans:I hope John Elway and Vance Joseph listened to Demaryius Thomas’s interview on 760 O&B. It basically confirms what all the fans have known: This coaching staff is a huge problem. 12. Washington Redskins:This team fell victim to what the Falcons SHOULD look like week in and week out. I hope they make adjustments or they’ll quickly see this division slip through their fingers. 13. Philadelphia Eagles:Lets hope they used their bye week to tweak some things and find their winning ways.14. Atlanta Falcons:Did you see that pounding they put on the Redskins? That’s what the Falcons were suppose to look like this year. They have all the firepower and weapons, they just struggle with putting it all together at the same time.15. Chicago Bears:The Bears have their moments, and this was definitely one of them. They’re scary and could very likely be a playoff team.16. Cincinnati Bengals:Bye week means they were unable to disappoint their fanbase.17. Seattle Seahawks:The reason why franchise QBs are so crucial to have was made apparent in this game. When you have one, the first 59 mins matter, but they can be overcome by a singular player. So close at home, but alas, the Chargers were just better.18. Denver Broncos:Well, if the Broncos want to get the highest draft pick possible, you keep Vance Joseph employed. DT ripped the team without ripping the team. He was simply talking truths. And when your coaching staff is so inept and rigid that you refuse to listen to your players, well http://www.broncoscheapauthenticstore.com/todd-davis-jersey-cheap , you see what happens. 3-6 at their bye week. For some they say “they could be 6-3”, to others, they could say “they could be 1-8.” This team has ALL THE PIECES to be a contender. They lack innovative coaching and of course a QB. The problem is, that I have no idea who a better coach would be? Who’s available that’s worth a damn? Do you bring in a re-tread? Do you go the hot coordinator way? Both are scary as hell. But you might as well keep VJ throughout the year so the Broncos don’t get that “new coach” bump by winning an extra game or two.19. Miami Dolphins:If only Adam Gase was available to be the Broncos coach. I’d snatch him up in a heartbeat. 20. Tennessee Titans:Nice victory against the Cowboys. They aren’t world beaters, but they’re a solid outing. 21. Jacksonville Jaguars:Did the Jaguars make adjustments to fix their team? Or are they still broken? The bye week provides zero answers, but this next week’s game should. 22. Cleveland Browns:Bruce Arians said he’d come out of retirement for the Browns’ job. Is that a good idea or bad idea though? 23. Detroit Lions:“Mamma said that if you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything.” 24. Indianapolis Colts:So many bye weeks in the NFL. I do wish they’d space them out and add another week to the season. Anyways, Andrew Luck is heating up. I think the Colts should have tried for DT, but oh well. Maybe they don’t want to win the division? Irsay must be on a bender. 25. Dallas Cowboys:Amari Cooper caught a TD, but there wasn’t much more excitement in the house that Jerry built. Which kinda sums up their season. 26. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: I’m not sure what in the world is going on in Tampa Bay. Maybe it’s all the delicious Cuban food, but they seem to put up points regardless of who is back there taking snaps. 27. New York Jets:Six points? Six? Do you really need to say anything more than that? Last year’s team was better than this year’s team, and that’s scary going forward. They better hope Darnald microwaves in a hurry.28. Buffalo Bills:Ah, Buffalo, the team who forgot how to play football.29. Arizona Cardinals:Mercifully the bye week came, which means they didn’t lose a game. They didn’t win a game either, but at least they didn’t lose a game. I’m less and less impressed with Josh Rosen as the weeks go bye. 30. New York Giants:Stay the course New York, and you’ll find yourself picking #2 again to get your QB of the future, unless Chucky jettisons Derek Carr. 31. San Francisco 49ers:And the next “hot free agent QB to be overpaid” is.... Nick Mullens? Who? 32. Oakland Raiders:This team quit on their coach, on their team, and on their fans. Any time a team is seen laughing at how pathetic they are on the sidelines during the game and then playing like they don’t give a ^&$!, it’s a sign that they are already booking their offseason vacation plans. 1-15 until they aren’t!